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Today marks three weeks since I've had a smoke. Not one puff. Nothing. Do you have any idea how proud I am of myself? Do you have any idea how difficult it's been to kick this massive addiction? I have it set in my head now that if I have one drag of a cig, I will have to start all over again. The intense cravings are long gone. The massive crab ass state of mind is long gone. Just the habit now of getting on the phone with the girlfriend and going out to the garage to smoke lingers. The flip side is I have gained five pounds in three weeks. Five pounds added to what I am already lugging around on my 5'9 frame doesn't help. However, I have decided to join the gym my hubby works out at. Once baby boy gets used to daycare, which isn't going well so far, I am going to join. They offer babysitting for a buck an hour. That's off the charts! I can go the two days during the week I am off and other times with hubby. I lost 43 pounds walking on a treadmill and watching my weight seven years ago. Once I stopped the exercise and started saying yes again to pizza, it slowly all came back. I am so pissed off at myself for letting this happen. I am a weak, weak bitch. It's my own fault. I'd rather have clean lungs and possibly live to see my son graduate high school, and a bit larger ass for now. Plus my hubby is so, so happy. He doesn't ask for anything EVER besides me to quit smoking. I love that man.
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